Tag Archives: Matthew

Pathways of life: the easy ones aren’t always the best

Posted on January 6, 2017 by | Comments Off on Pathways of life: the easy ones aren’t always the best
pathways

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Pathways help us to know where to walk. Whether it is the city park, the sidewalk in the yard, or even the sidewalks downtown, pathways are always there, helping to direct the way for those who use them. It’s easy to see which pathways, like the ones in the John James Audubon Park, are the most often used. These are the ones that are wide, well maintained, and are fairly easy to follow. There are other paths that offer an even better view of some of the park’s scenery. But because they have steep hills and are a bit loner, they are less maintained. They simply are not paths that are as popular as the others.

A popular path isn’t always what it seems

This morning I shared a Dr. James Dobson webcast on The Daily Walk Facebook page about cohabitation. Unfortunately, I am one of those who believed what I was told about the supposed benefits of cohabitation before marriage. Why? To be completely honest, during the mid 1980s and into the 1990s even the sitcoms and music I listened to promoted the message that there was nothing wrong with it. In fact, I even had good friends and family members that promoted it as a sort of trial marriage – to make sure you’re compatible before you make the commitment of marriage. I think of the teachings of Jesus: Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat (Matthew 7:13).

At that time in my life, with family members and friends who claimed to be Christians, I wasn’t given any advice or information to counterbalance what I was being taught about cohabitation and marriage. My mother even provided the advice to my sister and myself of if your marriage doesn’t work out, there’s nothing wrong with divorce. For two marriages and nearly thirteen years, I had a very unbiblical view of marriage. My idea of marriage was based on advice offered that was the opposite of what God had designed marriage to be. As I listened to both yesterday’s and today’s webcast it hit me how often we are led astray by advice that originates on the wide path.

Placing the Lord as the focal point of your life’s pathways

As I often share, I did not come to receive Jesus as my only Lord and Savior until I was 36 years old. I had to reach the point where I was ready to completely surrender to His will. It also meant I had to unlearn everything I had come to understand about life. David wrote, Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore (Psalms 16:11). Since I’ve given my life to the Lord there’s been a great transformation that’s happened. Intentionally I have tried to make everything in my life Christ-centered. The way I had previously chosen left me with a lot of regrets and uncertainty.

I wanted to put what Paul wrote into practice, And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness (Ephesians 4:24). The rest of the passage quickly became the rallying cry needed to turn away from my old ways: Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.  Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:  Neither give place to the devil. Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth. Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers (Ephesians 4:25-29).

Learning a new way pathway takes time and commitment

There’s a verse in Psalms that I’d like to share: Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies (Psalms 27:11). As I have shared before, in 2006 I committed to study the Bible the way I was studying for my graduate coursework. I wanted to learn, genuinely learn, everything I could about my Lord and Saviour and my newfound faith. What I discovered is the Bible just is not some ancient and irrelevant book. It is a book that is extremely relevant in today’s world. Not only was I amazed at God’s plan for marriage but how misunderstood God’s plan is by the world. I was also amazed at the simplicity that the Lord had placed on ethics. It is never right to do wrong, no matter what outcome you are trying to create.

David also shared in Psalms how exactly he planned to learn about the pathways God had for him: Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee (Psalms 119:11). Anyone that has read David’s story as contained in the Bible knows he was far from a sinless and perfect man. He often made decisions that were far from perfect or being scriptural. But David did understand he was accountable to God for his actions and tried to make sure he honored God in all that he did. He also learned from his mistakes, asked forgiveness, and tried to be a better man each time he stood back up. For these reasons, I believe God called David, the son of Jesse, a man after mine own heart, (Acts 13:22b).

The broad pathways cause confusion, God’s plan is simpler

With the so-called ethical values of today’s society, we have created ethical dilemmas for many people. While the Bible teaches you are accountable for all you do, human society has adopted it really isn’t your fault mentality. The plain path David is asking the Lord to give him is one relatively free of confusion. It doesn’t have any gray areas that cause us to wonder about the best way to handle situations. The Lord has provided a life philosophy that is fairly cut-and-dried. If we come to something that causes us to act contrary to the word of God, then we simply don’t do it. We don’t take part in it.  As a matter of Biblical principle, it is never acceptable to do wrong to do something good or right.

We hear often of people who had good intentions and later find out the results were far from what they desired. Many times, there were compromises made along the way to get things moving in the direction desired. Maybe it’s a small business, a personal relationship, or just about anything else in life. If compromise and going against biblical principles is what it takes to do something, then it is not of God. It will not build anything that will last or bring glory to the Lord. Yes, it really is that simple. There are no grey areas with the Lord!

Understanding the simplicity of God’s plan

I have often told my Sunday school class that our Lord is a common-sense God. If we go back and study history, there are actual reasons why the various Old Testament laws concerning diet were put into place. There were psychological reasons marriage was to be monogamous. There were also reasons why farmers were supposed to let fields go fallow every seven years and to not harvest the corners of their fields. God understands the tendency we have to make things overly complex. Whether it is a favorite recipe, a lawnmower engine, or even relationships, mankind has a tendency to do things in a way that aren’t simple nor understandable from a practical point of view. 

God also understands we have a tendency to over-think things. I know this is one of my personality quirks. I’m always looking for the hidden reasons, the hidden meanings behind things. Once I accepted that God’s word was the final authority, and accepted it with a child-like faith as Jesus tells us to do, then I began to understand my relationship with my Lord and with my young daughter a lot better. It isn’t out of spite or meanness God tells us not to do certain things. It is out of love and a sincere desire not to see us hurt or to face the consequences for doing them. What parent wouldn’t want to spare their children from the agony of mistakes that could impact the rest of their life? Once you understand that, then you can understand why God’s pathway is the simplest one. 

 

 

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Learning to listen – an important trait of faith

Posted on November 29, 2016 by | Comments Off on Learning to listen – an important trait of faith

How-To-Listen

There are people hurting everywhere.  Sometimes, we are the ones who hurt. Sometimes, it’s the cashier at our local gas station, our mail carrier, family member, or close friend.  Maybe it is the person we come across only once in our life, but one thing remains the same about each of these – when we are hurting, sometimes all we want and need is for someone to listen.  The generations that are alive right now are considered as the most isolated generations in all of human existence.  We have computers, Internet, instant messaging, Skype, Facebook, Twitter, and a whole horde of other technology based gadgets and programs for making communication easier, yet we are more “unplugged” from each other than ever before.  We have lost the ability to listen to one another.

Learning to listen means putting things down

I will be completely honest; I didn’t start learning to listen until the Lord me with a daughter when I was 40. It wasn’t until my daughter hit four that I really understood that I truly didn’t know how to listen to others. She was having a bad day and was upset that nothing she tried to do was working. Since most of the courses I teach are on-line, I do most of my work from home at the family dining room table. So, that particular day, I made her lunch and sat back down at the table. She started talking to me and soon realized I was only partially listening. She got up from the table, walked around until she was beside me, then said, “Daddy, you’re not listening. Please pay attention…”

Within the King James Version of the Bible, the word “hearken” means listen. There’s a verse David wrote, Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD (Psalms 34:11) where he is inviting others to listen to what it means to truly follow after the Lord. It is a humbling experience to realize we listen without really paying attention to what is being said. Within my own Bible study, there’s been times where I will read a passage but because I’m not really listening to the Lord, I simply don’t get it. Then there are those times when I can read the same passage and the Lord shows me just what I needed for that day. The difference is in our willingness to listen.

Listening means setting aside the distractions

There are times we need to listen but our attentions are divided among many different things. I love the term, multi-tasking; it simply means “I’m working hard but won’t get anything totally finished…” At four years old, my daughter was wise enough to know she needed my undivided attention focused on her so that I could understand what she was trying to say. It is the same thing with Bible study. It’s hard to understand the message the Lord has for me when I read my Bible with the television on or with the many other distractions that often fills my day. 

Listening to my daughter meant turning away from my lap top and focusing solely on her and my conversation. Listening to the Lord means the same thing. It means purposely setting aside all else and focusing on the Lord. Since 2006, I have learned I gain more from my personal time with the Lord when all distractions are put away. We have become so accustomed to doing a half-dozen things at one time and if we are honest about it, none of them are completed as good as we could if we just focused on one thing at a time. 

Listening means gaining understanding

There are a couple of verses in Psalms that illustrate a difference in knowing and understanding. These two verses, Thy hands have made me and fashioned me: give me understanding, that I may learn thy commandments (Psalm 119:73) and My mouth shall speak of wisdom; and the meditation of my heart shall be of understanding (Psalms 49:3) show there is more than knowing. We gain an understanding of God’s plan when we become determined to seek Him out. David was asking not just to know God’s law, but to understand God’s law. David could only gain understanding by learning how to listen.

When it comes to listening to others, it is easy to simply casually listen, claiming we already know the gist of the conversation. Frankly, I’ve done that many times myself; the question is now, do I understand what they are saying? Do I understand how what they are sharing has affected them? Do I understand the need they must have to take a risk by sharing it with me? Truly learning to listen means we are willing to gain an understanding about the one speaking to us, about what they are talking about, and even about ourselves.

Learning to listen goes against our fleshly nature

I had a bit of an attitude problem when the Lord first laid on my heart that I needed to learn to listen. I didn’t understand there was a difference between hearing and listening. Listening is when we open ourselves to truly receiving what the other person is trying to say. If I am not careful, I still find myself falling back on not really listening as my daughter tries to talk with me. I honestly believe it goes against our fleshly nature to truly listen to someone else. We approach so much of life with preconceived notions of what we think is fair, of our own importance and abilities, and value.

It is not natural to subordinate ourselves to a lower and more humble place, yet that is what Jesus calls us to do: Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:4). As a college level instructor, I’m also learning to put this into practice for the first time this semester. I’ve noticed it does make a difference for some and actually catches others off-guard. Again, it took me stepping away from how I saw myself and putting into practice the very things the Lord teaches us to do. It also gives me an opportunity to share the gospel with students when they ask me why am I different from the other instructors they’ve encountered on campus. 

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Little things can make a difference in all we do

Posted on September 28, 2016 by | Comments Off on Little things can make a difference in all we do
little things

© Fedor Patrakov | Dreamstime Stock Photos

Little things do make a difference. Those who know me will tell you I am a details-oriented person. For me, it’s the little things that make a difference in all that I do. Whether it is for my job, for a project, or even just piddling around the house, details make a difference. This morning while doing my morning exercise routine, I decided to increase my route by a mile. Today was my regular walking day so I was listening to Southern Gospel music on an old MP3 player as I took to the hills of Elm Street in Henderson, Kentucky. Little did I know the spiritual lesson the Lord had in store for me this morning.

We serve a God that’s aware of the little things!

Fall has arrived in Henderson, Kentucky. Already, leaves are beginning to change from green to various shades of red, orange, and bright yellow. Most of all, there are other details – just little things – the Lord created to show to all who will look of the change of seasons. As I walked up the first hill at the corner of Elm Street and Powell, I brushed against a small bush and didn’t think much else about it. I continued to walk up the hill, looking at the faded blooms of summer. More little details that summer is over and winter is approaching. As I approached the intersection of Elm and Clay, I noticed an apple core someone had tossed out on the street. Ants had already found it and were busy taking it, piece by piece, to their hill in someone’s yard.

Immediately, I thought of this passage in Proverbs,  Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise:  Which having no guide, overseer, or ruler,  Provideth her meat in the summer, and gathereth her food in the harvest.  How long wilt thou sleep, O sluggard? when wilt thou arise out of thy sleep? (Proverbs 6:6-9). Most of us never even take much thought about ants unless we see them crawling across the counter top in the kitchen or we’ve managed to get bitten by them. Nevertheless, they are little things created by God and have a divine purpose. They serve as an object lesson to us and are a part of God’s plan that keeps our world going. Most of the time, their efforts go totally unnoticed by us; they keep doing what they are supposed to do anyway.

Little things matter in what we do for others

There’s a passage in the book of Matthew that reads, Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.  But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly (Matthew 6:1-4). As I was preparing to do today’s devotional, I thought about the teaching of this verse. Often we focus on the financial aspects of what the alms mean. I’ve even heard radio preachers try to put an exact dollar amount on it. This completely misses the point of what Jesus was trying to make.

When we feel moved by the Holy Spirit of the Lord to do something for someone else, no matter how small or large it is, we need to simply do it and not make any note of it. I’ll use my six-year old daughter as an example of this.  Earlier last week, without me asking her to, she went upstairs and brought down a roll of toilet paper to replace the empty roll in the bathroom downstairs. She didn’t even point it out. Later that afternoon, I noticed it had been replaced, so I asked her. She said, “Oh, Dad, I knew it had to be done so I just did it…” She then explained it made her feel good to something good to help. My daughter also felt that it wasn’t a big deal and was something that needed to be done anyway.

Little details in relationships go a long way

I shared that little story about my daughter to illustrate how a little detail such as her bringing down a roll of toilet paper can make a big difference in a parent-child relationship. It works both ways; my daughter thrives on such little things. A quick trip to Evansville on a Saturday afternoon, an unexpected play time where she gets to pick a game from the game closet, or even making one of her favorite meals – are all little details that let her know she’s cared and loved in our family. It doesn’t stop there. It’s the little details we do that go largely unnoticed by others that demonstrates our love for the Lord and for them. It can be something as simple as starting a pot of coffee, ironing a shirt, or whatever you can think of – these little details are important to those we love.

Our attitude about the little things has to be right and we have to have the purest of motives. You cannot have an expectation of getting something in return for what you’ve done. It sabotages what we’ve done and will only cause others to question why we do the things we do. When I was living in graduate housing in Carbondale, Illinois, I had neighbors that kept score over who did what and when. Everyone would hear the arguments that would happen when one spouse felt slighted by the other. Consequently, their relationship didn’t last long. Not only did they demand the little things from the other, they had an expectation that whatever they did for the other, the other would reciprocate. This is not in the right spirit of how we are to approach the idea of doing things for others. 

Get out there and do…

As I made my way back towards home this morning, I watched an older lady watering plants on her front porch. Her husband came onto the porch with a pitcher of water and asked her to hand him her watering can. When she thanked him and asked about his reasoning to help her with her chore, he said “just consider it as an ‘I love you…’ ” and with that, he went back into the house. Now I will be the first to admit I know nothing about those two; I’ve never walked that route before today. However, from that one act of “little things” her husband did and her reaction to it, it was clear they regularly do such tokens of love for one another.

I’m resolved more than ever to pay attention to these little things – but not only for my family but for those I encounter throughout the week. My heart’s desire is to make a difference in the life of someone each and every day. I want that difference to point them to Jesus, my Lord and Savior.

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